In the last couple of weeks, I’ve found myself having different conversations with young boys/men between the ages of 15 and 24. While the conversations have cut across diverse topics, I’ve observed a common thread that is giving me quite a bit of concern. I must say that I was pleasantly surprised by the willingness of these boys to open up and have “deep” conversations. It was almost as though they just needed to exhale, and I allowed them to do just that. I believe what helped was that I offered them a safe space free of judgment and shaming. … Continue reading When Boys Have Daddy Issues
The summer holiday has been quite interesting. I’ve had the pleasure of interacting with various teenagers across that age spectrum from different backgrounds (rich, poor, middle class). We’ve had some pretty engaging conversations – from fashion to dating to exam malpractices. One thing that’s kept the wheels in my brain churning, is how differently the views of a significant number of these teens and young adults, on some key matters, are from parents. While I understand that their prefrontal cortex (the part of the brain that helps people make rational decisions) is not fully developed till probably age 25, I still can’t … Continue reading What’s Wrong With ‘Sharing’?
It’s been a while I wrote an article and to be honest my excuses range from outright laziness to writer’s block but I just had to shake the excuses off and do this post in honor of one of the dearest persons to my heart who happens to be the main character in this gist. It’s also her birthday…congratulations my darling, love you plenty❤️ So, this happened about a week ago… I was chatting on WhatsApp with a friend. Let’s call her “Mama Bear” and I noticed from her response that she was distracted so I asked what the issue … Continue reading Don’t Mess With Mama Bear!
Life can be so stressful sometimes that making simple choices like what to have for lunch or what to wear can seem like such a major decision. Asking a child or teen what he/she wants to do with his/her life… Hmmm. I’m trying to remember at what age I figured out what I wanted to do with my life 💭💭 The world of work is changing so fast! With AI and robots becoming more of our everyday reality, today’s choice may be obsolete tomorrow. So dear parents I beg let’s ease up on the pressure. Yes, we should guide our … Continue reading I Don’t Know What I Want To Do With My Life Yet!
Can you imagine these children! Of course, we’re always right…abi🤷🏽♀😜 Okay so jokes apart when it comes to having more experience no one can argue – parents have loads. The issue of always being right is a different matter. Continue reading Why Do Parents Feel They’re Always Right?
We live in an age where it’s believed that to get noticed one has to be outgoing and that being shy can be a disadvantage. However, that may not necessarily be the case especially when a proper distinction is made between timidity and shyness. As soon as this episode came out on YouTube, an older friend of mine who is a High Court Judge shared some great insights with me and has graciously given me her permission to reshare. “This is a very good topic and well dealt with Charity! I was a very shy child who grew up to … Continue reading What’s Wrong With Being Shy?
The 2019 presidential elections in Nigeria have just been concluded and for me, there are many lessons to be learned. I do not speak from the standpoint of a person affiliated to any particular political party but as a concerned parent and citizen. I also do not stand as ‘judge’ because I consider myself to be on trial too. I just think that we need to ask ourselves pertinent questions. All kinds of drama have played out throughout this election period but the one I have not been able to wrap my head around is the dismal number of people … Continue reading What Is Really Important To Us?
Don’t be in too much of a hurry to breathe a sigh of relief because your child doesn’t demand money from you. It would be expedient to know the source of the things they own and how they sustain themselves and their lifestyle. Do you give them pocket money? Do they work or have side hustles? Unfortunately, some people have buckled under economic, financial and peer pressure leading them into different types of questionable money-making ventures – gambling, trading sexual favors, yahoo plus, plugging drugs for cash… To avoid any “shocks” please ask questions. If you ask me, source matters! Continue reading Should The Source Matter?
Helping our children minimize the risks and maximize the benefits of technology is one of the demands of parenting in the digital age. Every once in a while, we come across ‘challenges’ that can be detrimental to our children’s wellbeing. The Momo Challenge is one of such and it’s important we are aware so we can help our children navigate the digital world safely. The article https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/8515907/momo-challenge-fortnite-youtube-instagram-self-harm/ throws light on the Momo challenge. “Momo is a disturbing ‘suicide’ game that has spread through social media platforms such as WhatsApp and Facebook. The sick game Momo begins with an avatar – … Continue reading Digizen Alert – Momo Challenge
My take is that if a child is too scared to verbally express love to a parent, chances are that the parent rarely does too. Parenting by fear to the extent that your child is too scared to say “I love you” is not healthy. Continue reading Too Scared To Say “I Love You”
Can parents really afford not to talk to their children about sex? A couple of days ago, a story broke on social media about 2 young guys (in their 20’s) who allegedly drugged a 23-year-old girl, raped and videoed the act. Word on the street is that these Naija boys are quite popular on the social scene. Not celebrities, just regular young guys who went to decent schools and live in decent neighborhoods. I was becoming really worried by the trend observed not just in Nigeria but globally. News headlines feature various sex-related crimes against children. It’s really sad. It is … Continue reading New Book Alert!
December in Nigeria can be a lot of fun – concerts, events, and weddings. Ahh! Naija weddings are truly something to behold. From the decor to the food, dance steps, and the dressing. Kai! Nigerians truly know how to “slay”. We turn up looking very regal and gorgeous. Ladies are flawlessly made up (at least most of the time) stunning attire and headgear. Even the men aren’t left behind. Totally on fleek with their well-tailored traditional attire, the groomsmen all looking like “Yoruba demons” wearing well crafted bespoke shoes. One can’t help but notice though, the stunningly beautiful ladies – … Continue reading Dress Code: Slay with Decency